


James T. Kirk x Freddy Krueger

by PastelPukePink



Category: A Nightmare on Elm Street (Movies 1984-1994), Star Trek: The Original Series
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-25
Updated: 2019-02-25
Packaged: 2019-11-05 17:01:41
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 586
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17922806
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PastelPukePink/pseuds/PastelPukePink
Summary: This is satire. More information in the author's notes.





	James T. Kirk x Freddy Krueger

**Author's Note:**

> As stated, this is satire. While performing a livestream someone in the chat joked that they were writing a fanfic with James T. Kirk/Freddy Krueger featuring: vore, Mpreg, and feet. I took it upon myself to bring this abomination to the world.
> 
> Also, everyone is out of character. I know so little about Star Trek. Don't take this too seriously. Have a laugh, that's what it's meant for.

                Captain James T. Kirk woke up in a cold sweat. For a few nights now he’d been plagued by nightmares of a man disfigured by burns chasing him in an industrial area, a boiler room? He had work to do though. Fatigued from lack of sleep, he walked to the command bridge, taking a seat in his captain’s chair.

                “Captain, if I may,” Spock said, leaning down so he could whisper, “You haven’t been looking so well. Perhaps some rest is needed. It’s only logical.”

                “No way, I hadn’t thought of that!” Kirk screamed, sarcasm dripping from his voice. His scream had startled everyone on the bridge.

                Spock stood, hands behind his back before Vulcan nerve pinching Kirk into oblivion. Kirk’s unconscious body slumped in the seat and Spock tried his hardest to get Kirk to sit up.

                “He’s fine.” He insisted to the rest on the crew.

 

                Kirk was once again, in the hot red boiler room and he threw his hands to his head.

                “YOU VULCAN SLUT!” He screamed to the heavens, freaking out.

                “Oh Kiiirrk.” A low voice taunted, the sound of knives being dragged across metal filling Kirk’s ears.

                Soon, there stood a figure, silhouetted against the red lights of the boiler room, knife hand flicking beside his face.

                Kirk charged at the man like he was a Gorn and started beating him in slow-motion. Freddy stood there in disbelief.

                “Uhm,” Freddy started, Kirk’s blows beginning to tickle him.

                “Die, monster! You don’t belong in this world!”

                “I literally live here.” Freddy said before pushing Kirk to the ground. Freddy wrestled with Kirk on the ground for a little, the both of them getting hot and sweaty, probably cause they were in a boiler room from Hell.

                Freddy bit Kirk’s leg and Kirk beat on Freddy’s head, the blows remarkably weak.

                “What are you even doing?” Freddy asked, pulling Kirk’s boots off. His feet really smelled. “Oh, that’s a foot.” Freddy said, matter-of-fact. He tickled the bare foot with his knife hand and Kirk squirmed.

                “NO!” Said Kirk.

                Then Freddy extended his tongue and began to lick and suckle all those little piggies and Kirk was laughing hysterically. It tickled too much.

                “Enough foreplay.” Freddy said, pulling his pants down and turning around, “Boldly go where no man has gone before!”

                Kirk, being faced with a black hole had no other choice but to stick his dick in it.

                The two began fucking fiercely. Sweaty bodies making slapping noises as they both moaned and grunted against each other.

                “Take me daddy!” Freddy squealed.

                “Who the fuck even are you?” Kirk asked, not minding too much since Freddy’s anus was tight and vice gripping his dick so well. Kirk had performance issues lately so he came hard in Freddo’s anus.

                “Oh shit.” Freddy said, “Hope I don’t get pregnant.”

                The word “pregnant” startled Kirk so bad that he woke up. Groggily looking around at everyone on the command bridge before turning to Spock.

                “Afternoon, captain.” Spock greeted. Captain Kirk slapped Spock across the face hard. Spock stood there like nothing had happened though his cheek had turned a bright red from the impact. “Thank you, captain.” He replied.

 

NINE MONTHS LATER

 

                Kirk had fallen asleep after a blissful orgy with Orion slave girls. The boiler room appeared again, fires surrounding him as Freddy Krueger showed up, belly swollen with babe.

                “Kirk, I’m pregnant!”

                “No, you’re not!” Kirk protested, opening his mouth and swallowing Freddy down his gullet. Thus ending his problem.

 

**THE END**

**Author's Note:**

> This featured literally every kink I hate but I was laughing so hard.


End file.
